Dark Poetry Prose Poetry October 30, 2003 Dark Poetic Prose

10-30-03 thursday 8:30am brick NJ

autumn smiles are softer than summer ones -
easier to say goodbye;
easier still just to sit in your chair
and never answer them.

like how leaving at just the right pause
leaves both your hearts full
with the joy for longer;
you try to recreate that reaction
when nothing's happened,
but you're only remembering when;

you're only wanting what you
borrowed to come back and
pretend it's your again.

10-30-03 7:41pm thursday brick NJ

connected. as sentences in paraphaphs. chapters to the end. pauses into silence. lovers into friends.

tried and convicted by a jury of yourself. forever asks you questions, but you just ignore her. breath makes its promises of living, but you don't take them.

hungry and hollow as a dead man's eyes. bleating and nervous as a lamb beside a lion.

nevermore could not be so true as it is this moment. the raven never so black as when my window he came to.

connected. as the butterfly effect. gently a heart's wings flap and a tornado is born in another's chest.

waiting is for those who love time. and living for those whom she adores. and dying is for the rest of us. those who cannot wait. cannot wait another minute.

10-30-03 7:56pm brick NJ thursday

turn on the light. orange ocean flooding your eyes. swim through sight like touching someone for the very first time. turn on the light. turn on the sound. waves of sound striking your thoughts. turning timid hearts loud.

reach out. arms like tree limbs. they try to grow. to stretch, but their roots won't let them.

never had to. just revel in the occurance. it happens either way. might as well participate. never had to do anything except exist. it happens. even when you don't think you want it.

10-30-03 9pm brick NJ thursday

alone. you don't know it. cuz if you did we would've long since met and done our damage.

alone. how you feel it. in your bones. in your chest. stalled heartbeats. bartered breaths. alone in life. alone in death.

quiet as a blade of grass kissing morning's first dew drop. shy as a different child.

fight your musings. slaughter your thoughts with the cold blade of drug and demon. your heart rattling like a boat in a thunderstorm tethered to the pier in your conscience.

alone. it beguiles like movie green screens do. seeming so real. and yet it's all contrived. just lots of eager people being payed to deceive.

we all hear the silence. but everyone hears it different. it can be a sweet ballad or it can be wagnerian cacophony. we all hear the silence. we are all alone. but for each it is different. such is the nature of alone. no one else knows. they never can. life crackles like a bottle breaking open. full of froth and vigor. brimming with pleasures better left unknown.

alone. you don't know it. no one does. every one has their own version. a billion different director's cuts of the same lame story. and all the endings believe what they must. every ending is just how the writer wanted.

10-30-03 thursday 9:41pm brick NJ

hmm. well i don't know. how could i when. running screaming children. playgrounds in the desert. topless exotic dancers. stages in the back of your head.

and if you ever lost you know that it's because. if you cried then you know that it goes back to. if not another tear to be shed. well, good luck with that my friend.

well, i don't know. should i. is that what you expected. i mean, who knows. who ever has. butterffly glances flapping on the wings of the wind. everything's happening and it's already happened before you realize that it did.

like these words so sprite. like those choices that you made. so accustomed to anything that isn't. so in love with the wanted that you never could stand to have it.

hmmm. well, it seems you don't either. nothing outside of the world you've created in your own image. the subtle lines that pull on strings inside where you wonder if. where you ask if. but you'll never know.

i don't know. i shouldn't have to. as for you. that's a question of how much you're willing to wager.

i don't know. why am i obligated to. my bets are empty. my chips are worthless. i could lose. but i'd never know it. i only can wonder, how much are you willing to risk?