Dark Poetry Prose Poetry February 20, 2004 Dark Poetic Prose

02-20-04 friday 10pm brick NJ

posture to the moonlight. all full of doubt and self-sacrifice. sit in your darkness and compare their lives to your own. only knowing that you can't. only knowing that you don't know.

coax the sorrow like a pussycat. with glittery ribbons of could have dangling from nights alone.

but i know that i tried to live. it must just be that i did it wrong. and i know that i tried to believe in happiness. seems i was just praying to the wrong god.

i tried to be real. to them. to myself. i layed down in the glue and then rolled through the sparkles, but they wouldn't stick. i really thought that i loved myself and that someone else could too. i tried to be real, but then again that familiar darkness ensued.

take your hours like each one is a penalty for ever having been. that's just how it feels. moonlight and songs dance against the shadows. a theater of could haves in a life that never did. i tried to live. it just sent me back to my coffin. i tried to reach out, but it was such a great distance.

i may never know how it feels, but i'll imagine that i did. when i remember those moments when it still seemed possible. i may never know if your lives are better or worse than mine is. maybe it's just as well.

2-20-04 friday 10:44pm brick NJ

choices. that's all we have to gauge who we've been. who we will. choices festering like bacteria in the folds of our sin. choices. if you don't make them. then you're made by them.

choices are the difference between giving in to those who want you only because your conveneint and those who really need.

as if anyone ever could need that much. as if such a chocie was ours to make.

those kinds of choices are determined by forces out of our grasp. our only options are what we do with them.

choice. that's life summarized. choose what you will and hope that you don't regret it. choice. like a vulture eyeing a carcass. bury your dead before they are consumed. choices. choose before they choose for you.

note: sin is not a typo as in "folds of our sin".