Dark Poetry Prose Poetry May 7, 2003 Dark Poetic Prose

05-07-03 wed. brick NJ 10:12pm

from inside my capsule i still picture you in my mind. from inside this solitude there's always you. it's just that i know i don't belong.

i could talk to you. i could laugh with you if i wanted to. but i've never known why.

i used to think love. love is enough. or even if not, then friendship. trust. all the cliched reasons that hearts refuse to give up.

i could listen. it would be my pleasure. and i would again, if i could find one single reason. if one second of it mattered. if i thought for one minute that's what you needed.

you don't know what it's like. surrounded by yourself. echoes of every breath resonating as if the whole world has gone and left you. like there's nothing left to life except these incessant and unabating breaths. and to breathe is the last thing you want to do, but you can't stop. you don't know what it's like. and i would never want for you to.

from silence there sometimes come words. the kind you never heard until the moment had a chance to pause. from alone together sometimes is found. but such is not the case this time. i would talk to you. i would listen to anything you felt like saying. i could. i would. it would be an honor to spend another hour knowing you. and i would if i could. if i could just find a reason to. something more than dollars and cents. i believe you, but i just don't believe it's enough. i believe in what you meant, i just don't believe it's love.