Dark Poetry Prose Poetry July 23, 2003 Dark Poetic Prose

7-23-03 9pm wednesday brick NJ

wrestling minds. pounding on the rules that confine.

talking, laughing like children. playground teasing with adult themes

in this life stifled by itself laughter is a lie. don't believe me when i smile. there's always a thought back there betraying.

i don't want to care about you. risk that kind of disappointment. it's too late. i'm already so attached. i didn't want to, but it happened. now i'm afraid all the time. afraid of when it will end. becuz i know it must. and i don't want to have to recover again. since every recovery only leads to the next.

why cry when you can laugh? it's just as easy to do when you can't tell the difference. why sleep when you can stay awake beating your body with chemicals and friends? it always makes the mornings so much sharper. like going too fast around a corner. knowing you're gonna crash, but you can't slow down. you can't stop. your brain protests, but your body doesn't listen. your heart says no, but your flesh says go. wounds heal, but memory doesn't. time forgives, but chances don't come back.

7-23-03 9am wednesday brick NJ

writing hard -
writing fast -

the hands reveals all that
the voice cannot command;

whether it be telling
sweet truths all too private,
or building shelters
for the mind;

lose a rhyme,
but gain a verse -
seal my fate
in just one word.